Sometimes I can't handle drama... OK... I never can handle drama. Sometimes I'm good at not saying anything to the person attempting to draw attention to themselves over something obviously retarded. I never understood it in High School and I understand it even less now that I have a teen of my own. Some of the things that are an end of the world freak out to her are like... oh... ummm REALLY? WTH is wrong with you that this is a huge damn deal. I'm guessing that most of it is age. When exactly do they outgrow that stage? I'm hoping it's soon. I have two others rapidly approaching teenage years and I'm not sure I can handle drama from all three without making them feel extremely bad for being dumb.
On a more "exciting" note the kids father is back in town for a visit. Lets hope that aside from the initial act like retard moment that he had upon calling me this afternoon, that the kids have a good visit and he remains ummm.... less retarded.
And to end this post on a positive note, I can't wait for my anniversary weekend away alone with the hubby. Will be the first time since our youngest was born over 2 years ago.
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Thursday, September 20, 2012
Life Changes
I guess you could say recently I've been on a bit of a journey. The kind were you not only change what you do, but your way of thinking as well. Some days it has been a challenge and then there are days I think I just can't take one more step, but then I do, and I keep moving forward. I think what I've been doing has been good for me. Getting back into running has taught me that I had lost a lot of self discipline, but I'd like to think over the past almost 6 weeks that I've gained some of that back. I also had lost a good deal of self control. The kind that is required to not sit down and eat a whole pound of pasta or cup and a half of rice. Tracking what I eat has showed me exactly how much I was eating that I just didn't need to eat. I'd like to think that I've changed these bad habits that I had for good, but everyone slips up. I'm sure I'll have days or meals that I'll want something that's not good for me. I'm hoping I've made it far enough where I won't be tempted to go back and eat just anything. I suppose only time will tell with that one. Though I would like to think that I value my health enough now to be able to resist those temptations.
So I suppose I should probably mention what it is I have changed or worked towards changing, there has been really three main goals.
1. Get back into running. About 6 weeks ago I started a couch to 10K program that I have been working through which includes running/walking slowly working towards running all the time.
2. Better nutrition, this includes tracking what I eat without exception cutting out oils and limiting alcohol.
3. Mind set, instead of thinking that I can't do something testing myself to see if I can do before I decide that I just can't. Having more confidence in my abilities.
All of this includes saying more, "you can do it" instead of saying "that's too hard". Getting into this program I learned that motivation to get out there and do it is 98% mental 2% physical and that 9 times out of 10 what was trying to stop me from doing it was that is was hard. I learned that with hard work comes progress and started looking at each workout as a challenge and opportunity to test the limits of my body. I've lost 10lbs, well I had lost 10lbs, bounced back into the 9 and some change range this morning, but that's expected. I gain a little then lose it, then gain and little then lose more. It's nothing that concerns me. As long as I keep going and don't give up I know I will eventually get where I want and need to be with both my physical endurance and weight lose. On the path to a healthier, happier me and I'm loving it.
I am officially one workout away from being halfway done. I can't even believe I've made it this far, but I'm excited and nervous to see what the next 6 weeks of this program will bring for me. In the back of my head I still wonder and hope that I can do it. I try and push that out of my head because experience had taught me that if I don't think I can do it, then I can't. I won't back down and I WILL finish this. I've come too far to give up now. Next week is 4 minutes running 2 minutes walking, just saying that makes me nervous, but I know that I'm going to get out there and do it. If I need to repeat a week then I do and it's not the end of the world, but would like to make it through without needing to.
Watching my family all sit around and do pretty much nothing honestly makes me wonder how I ever was able to just do nothing. I'm so much happier being active, and am glad I finally got off my butt and decided it was time to do something about me doing nothing all the time. I was tired of being fat (for me) and I was tired of feeling tired all the time. I hated the way my clothes fit and how I felt about myself. Glad to be able to say that my views on myself are changing... slowly.... but changing. I suppose slow progress is better then no progress.
So I suppose I should probably mention what it is I have changed or worked towards changing, there has been really three main goals.
1. Get back into running. About 6 weeks ago I started a couch to 10K program that I have been working through which includes running/walking slowly working towards running all the time.
2. Better nutrition, this includes tracking what I eat without exception cutting out oils and limiting alcohol.
3. Mind set, instead of thinking that I can't do something testing myself to see if I can do before I decide that I just can't. Having more confidence in my abilities.
All of this includes saying more, "you can do it" instead of saying "that's too hard". Getting into this program I learned that motivation to get out there and do it is 98% mental 2% physical and that 9 times out of 10 what was trying to stop me from doing it was that is was hard. I learned that with hard work comes progress and started looking at each workout as a challenge and opportunity to test the limits of my body. I've lost 10lbs, well I had lost 10lbs, bounced back into the 9 and some change range this morning, but that's expected. I gain a little then lose it, then gain and little then lose more. It's nothing that concerns me. As long as I keep going and don't give up I know I will eventually get where I want and need to be with both my physical endurance and weight lose. On the path to a healthier, happier me and I'm loving it.
I am officially one workout away from being halfway done. I can't even believe I've made it this far, but I'm excited and nervous to see what the next 6 weeks of this program will bring for me. In the back of my head I still wonder and hope that I can do it. I try and push that out of my head because experience had taught me that if I don't think I can do it, then I can't. I won't back down and I WILL finish this. I've come too far to give up now. Next week is 4 minutes running 2 minutes walking, just saying that makes me nervous, but I know that I'm going to get out there and do it. If I need to repeat a week then I do and it's not the end of the world, but would like to make it through without needing to.
Watching my family all sit around and do pretty much nothing honestly makes me wonder how I ever was able to just do nothing. I'm so much happier being active, and am glad I finally got off my butt and decided it was time to do something about me doing nothing all the time. I was tired of being fat (for me) and I was tired of feeling tired all the time. I hated the way my clothes fit and how I felt about myself. Glad to be able to say that my views on myself are changing... slowly.... but changing. I suppose slow progress is better then no progress.
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